Lame :x

Seriously, bored people should read these : 

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Char Siew Bao and Mee Kia got involved in an argument. Char Siew Bao got very angry and shouted at Mee Kia, " I'm going to find my gang to hamtam you "

So Char Siew Bao went to round up Lin Yong Bao and Dou Sar Bao

Just then, Maggi Mee walked around the corner. Immediately, the Bao's gang started to beat him up.

As Char Siew Bao was punching Maggi Mee, he shouted : " Don't think just because you perm your hair, we can't recognize you, ok! "

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This is one that works great in real life. In text, the effect is not so 'powerful'.

A mute guy goes to the store. He wants to buy a toothbrush. How does he communicate his request to the shopkeeper ?

If you thought he gestured the action of brushing his teeth, you're correct !

Now say a blind guy goes to the store. He wants sunglasses. What does he do ?

Did you immediately think of gesturing the action of putting on glasses? If you did, flush your head down the toilet bowl ! 

The blind guy can easily speak to communicate with the shopkeeper !

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One day Joe went out to Orchard Road wearing his favourite pair of sneakers. He saw this girl pass by him as he was boarding the MRT and was smitten immediately - love at first sight. He went back to tell his friends and they were all curious to know about the girl.

"Is she very cute, like Yang Chen Ling?"

"Nope."

"Is she very sexy, like Jessica Alba?"

"Nope."

"But you don't even know her yet! If she's not cute or sexy, what made you so attracted to her?", his friends were all dumbfounded.

"Well, she was wearing the exact same pair of sneakers that I was wearing that day..." , Joe said.

"WHAT???!!!", his friends exclaimed.

"Yeah...the moment I saw her I knew we were sole mates..." 

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Sorry for being so lame :D